Letting Go of Mr./Ms. Perfect Person
Posted by Sean Stargazer | Posted in Inner Growth | Posted on 12-01-2010
Tags: authenticity, awakening, Inner Growth
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photo credit: Eustaquio Santimano
In my experience, one of the most difficult things I have ever had to do is to see myself as I really and for whom I really am. I have been visualising myself as my ideal self for so long I actually feel lost without this potent tool guiding me.
This morning while watching an infomercial, promising parents better tools to parent their children; I began to ask myself this question:
- What would happen if I let go of my ideal version of myself, what would my life look like?
- What freedom would I enjoy?
Now I am still in the beginning stages of exploring these questions. However, I feel that these questions could be the key to freeing myself from limitation.
Why?
Because as long as I am comparing myself to some fictional, yet idealised version of myself, I am not accepting myself as I am and for whom I am. And that feels awful. As long as I try to live up to herculean expectations, I remain unaware of what is really important to me and what I really want.
I get to mentally torture myself in fine pointy ways as well. I draw an odd yet unhealthy comfort in trying to be Ms. Perfect Person, and failing and torturing myself some more.
So, how can we let go of our perfect selves, and embrace who we are?
I have found it helpful to accept my mistakes, my flaws, my quirks in all. For example, I am not a nice person. Whatever a nice person is, I know I am as far away from that ideal as it is possible to be on this earth. If there is a nice person planet all nice people go to when I am sleeping or daydreaming, I know I will never visit this planet.
And the reason is: I don’t want to be a nice person. To me, a nice person is someone whom others walk on. Someone who does what others want whilst ignoring what’s best for themselves. Nice people usually end up angry and resentful about all that they have done for others and feel bitter than no one saw fit to do the same for them.
Why do I believe this?
I was taught this by my Gran, a woman I love and respect. She was a nice person. Always doing her best to help others whilst sacrificing what might be best for her. An example of this comes from my early childhood. My Mum was going out with a man who was physically, verbally, and mentally abrusive. My Gran tried to get on with this man for my Mum’s sake; to be nice. She even loaned the man money to move into his own flat when his behaviour led him to attack my sister whilst she was holding my baby niece in her arms.
Now being a nice person isn’t a bad thing. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to help your friends and loved ones when you feel the need to. It’s a problem when niceness gets in the way of you being you. Let me illustrate my point further using the childhood story I shared with you.
What’s authentic to my Gran: seeing to it that my family was safe from a toxic influence (my Mum’s boyfriend). What’s inauthentic: pretending to like a person she would cheerfully have run over if he’d been standing in the middle of the road. I know she would have loved to have done away with the fellow; she told us she had dreams about his death all the time. And she would be smiling happily when she contemplated the earth without his shadow upon it.
That’s my Gran’s Ms. Perfect Person. Helping people she didn’t like.
Mine is: feeling like I need to agree with other people’s points of view in order to be liked. This did not work as well as I would have liked.
Letting Go of the Need to Be Perfect
I know what you all are thinking. Let go of the need to be perfect? How the bloody hell do I do that?
Okay. This is not going to be easy. Or comfortable. I need to say that right now. Some changes that are deeply ingrained in us can be a challenge to relinquish. This is no exception. Believe me, I am still trying.
The Tao of letting go is like this:
Step One: Accept that you are not perfect. And probably never will be. And that’s okay. The point isn’t to live up to some idealised version of yourself, it’s to explore more deeply who you really are. Whomever that might be now.
Step Two: Let it be okay that you have made mistakes. You have made mistakes. So have I. Let’s all get together and love ourselves anyway. Mistakes are necessary parts of the growth process that the spirit enjoys experiencing. You don’t have to like your mistakes. Or feel positive about them. Scream, cry, howl at your mistakes.
Go ahead. I’ll wait.
Dum-de-dum-de-dum…
Great! Now say this with me:
Mistakes are not the end of the world! I will survive if I make a mistake.
And you will. You have made many mistakes in the past and you are still numbered amongst the living. We can now safely assume that the trend will continue. Unless, of course, you make the mistake of launching a rocket to the sun with the intention of setting up a colony there. That might be a costly mistake.
But most other mistakes can be lived down quite nicely without too many scapes and bruises.
What does this have to do with letting go of Mr./Ms. Perfect Person?
Glad you asked!
When you accept yourself warts, shadows and all, including your mistakes you open up the door (or window, if you prefer) to let go of the need to criticise, judge, or belittle yourself into being your ideal self. And that leads to loving yourself right where you are. Not in some distant future when you have achieved perfection. Cuz that may never happen.
Why wait that long? Do you intend to live forever? I don’t. Whilst I am here I intend to live my life to the fullest with plenty of magick, fun and adventure.
Vibelicious comments:
How about you? Are you ready to let go of your Mr./Ms. Perfect Person? If not, what is holding you back?
Remember kind, compassionate comments are always welcome. Rude, mean comments aren’t and will be deleted.


